“It is what it is.”

healthwellnessyogameditationmindfulnesshealingSelf-Improvementbreathing

May 18

Written By Jessica Ackerman

"Life never asks you to be more than you are. It celebrates your existence exactly where you are."
-Matt Kahn

Episode 46.

“It is what it is.”

This trite saying has always struck me as lacking any real depth, but it actually captures a huge statement of wisdom in its 5 tiny words, a total of only 12 letters. It may not seem profound, yet it imports significant weight, if we actually respect it as a principle of attending to and accepting something; surrendering to the unfolding of a circumstance… “It is what it is.”

What if I told you that believing in and practicing this notion could counter much of the struggles of life or sufferings that are gripping you? That seems a bold prospect. 12 letters combined to eradicate suffering?

Typically, we hear this adage or utter these words when something happens that is unwelcome, troublesome, or problematic. Someone offers us platitudes or words of encouragement- “it’s not so bad”- and we retort with “it is what it is.” (It sucks and I am complaining about it, but I don’t want to come across as a downer or bratty pessimist).

But sometimes we utter this sentiment when we actually accept what is happening. “It is what it is.” can be a genuine embracing, perhaps even a loving of what arises and unfolds in life. There are circumstances, probably out of our control, and probably undesirable, yet we can actually intentionally accept, allow, and embrace them. We manage to love whatever transpires, no matter how much we are thrown for a loop, or derailed from our life’s path, or confronted with an unpredictable rug-pulled-out scenario, “It is what it is.” (said with ease and light).

This is the counter to our suffering. 5 short words. 12 letters.

Suffering (or, to make it less dramatic or traumatic, we can use the word discontent), emerges when we cling to things under the mistaken view that they will last forever. Because, in reality, nothing can last forever. We suffer when we are against what is actually happening or unfolding; when we push back against change and attach to things being a certain way; when we crave permanence and operate under the falsehood that we can divert things from their mortal nature. As long as we expect to hold on to things as they are, this suffering and discontent is inevitable. Because things of this life and of this world are always changing, shifting, transitioning.

“It is what it is.”

12 letters as a potent antidote to reduce human suffering.

Acceptance.

This does not imply passivity. This does not mean throw up our hands and relinquish our fight for rights; this does not mean give up our persistence in striving toward goals and improvements of self and progress in our world. But it does mean that acknowledging and respecting the ways in which life unfolds can bring us contentment and joy. This does mean that honoring our path and surrendering our illusion of control can lead to freedom.

“It is what it is” still invokes a sense of doom and dismay. But it doesn’t have to be cast in a bleak and discouraging light. I recently heard the phrase articulated to affirm goodness of a situation. During a morning walk on the beach, my walking partner spoke these words fervently to the admiration of the invigorating waves and intensely shining sun. A sort of honoring, a respect, a giving of credit to the bounty of nature, of which we were present to behold.

“It is what it is.”
Like true love.
Not explainable by words or even feelings or emotions. It just is.
And with this statement, we can accept and embrace the most beautiful synchronicity in depth of love, and at the same time, the most heartbreaking grief in fragility of loss.

All within 12 letters. "It is what it is."

Awake and acknowledging. Alive and accepting. Present and surrendering. Free and Being. Joyful.

Grateful that it is what it is.

Love,
Jess

“Whatever happens, love that.” - Matt Kahn

"Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend." - Melody Beattie

“This is true love. You think this happens every day?” - Westley, The Princess Bride

"Acceptance doesn't mean resignation; it means understanding that something is what it is and that there's got to be a way through it." -Michael J. Fox
“Accept – then act. Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you had chosen it. Always work with it, not against it.” – Eckhart Tolle

"True peace is having no plans other than facing what is." - Matt Kahn

“The acceptance of death gives you more of a stake in life, in living life happily, as it should be lived. Living for the moment.” – Sting

“Acceptance of one’s life has nothing to do with resignation; it does not mean running away from the struggle. On the contrary, it means accepting it as it comes, with all the handicaps of heredity, of suffering, of psychological complexes and injustices.” – Paul Tournier